It was the perfect way to differentiate between anal sex and just a sexy toy

That's how I felt about those tags as well: they were somewhat useful (despite the occasional inconsistent tagging). But one of the (ex-)admins didn't like them, and the tags got wiped without much forum discussion.

I actually wondered at one point if they could be aliased, after the toying_self tags were added. But there probably should've been more discussion about it (unless it was talked about in the committee, I wouldn't know since I wasn't staff at the time).