Don't know if this is the proper site to put this, but I'm familiar with ya'll here, so here it is:

As it says on the tin, I am giving away a toy. It's Chance in the natural mottled color. The toy will be completely and thoroughly sterilized.

When the toy arrives, you can pay what you want to the return address or PayPal, if you wish; at least to cover shipping. Payment isn't necessary, however. I am open to shipping internationally (I'm US), but you may have to pay for shipping up front.

Takers are first come, first serve—no exceptions. I am giving it away because I am taking my life in a different direction.

If you are interested or want additional details, send me a PM.

Aeruginis said:
I am giving them away because I am taking my life in a different direction.

I don't like the sound of that

Also, you should do a contest, like who has the biggest dick or best beard.

If nobody else claims them, I'd love one to beat my friends with.

Tuvalu said:
If nobody else claims them, I'd love one to beat my friends with.

Same. Especially that large Tyson one.

I'd be sure to make Varka proud.

Rustyy said:
Also, you should do a contest, like who has the biggest dick or best beard.

I'd win both of those, btw

heh

somebody's confident

Delivery of clandestine sex toys is a secret fantasy of mine. I'm probably too chicken to actually use one, but there was that one time...

Rustyy said:
I don't like the sound of that

Also, you should do a contest, like who has the biggest dick or best beard.

I'd win both of those, btw

That would not be fair to me since I would probably get last place in both of those contests.

Besides, if you really do have the biggest dick, why do you need a dildo?
I mean, you could probably just as well literally go fuck yourself.

I clicked on the page expecting toys like lego or train sets, not sex toys

My corruption is insufficient

I've wanted to try a sex toy for a little while now.

That said, I'm not sure I'm entirely comfortable giving away my address. Perhaps I can set up a PO Box temporarily.

Sounds kind of stupid and risky.

Well, I hope someone will receive dragon dildos and free pizza/timebombs in the mail. "Tyson" is just a.... beautiful name. :p

Clawdragons said:
I've wanted to try a sex toy for a little while now.

That said, I'm not sure I'm entirely comfortable giving away my address. Perhaps I can set up a PO Box temporarily.

I figured that peeps wouldn't want to give away their address. Would it make everyone feel better if I told you I am an individual of sound judgement and stiff moral fiber? haha

EDIT: I think both toys may be taken. Not sure yet, because someone needs to respond. The Tyson is for sure taken.

Rustyy said:
I don't like the sound of that

Also, you should do a contest, like who has the biggest dick or best beard.

I'd win both of those, btw

You know it's always the loudest guys who pack the least >:3

oh and also, what does having the biggest dick have to do with getting a fucking dildo?

I say all contestants head over to xhamster or whatever and show us what they can do

aawww yea

Rustyy said:
I don't like the sound of that

Also, you should do a contest, like who has the biggest dick or best beard.

I'd win both of those, btw

...what do you do if you don't have a dick or a beard? :v

Also for the record I'd be up for getting my hands on one. :v

The_Diggler said:
oh and also, what does having the biggest dick have to do with getting a fucking dildo?

Well if he's REALLY big, the toy can double as a sounding tool.

I don't know what the beard is for though. Toy storage?

Clawdragons said:
Well if he's REALLY big, the toy can double as a sounding tool.

I can only imagine.

Kristal_Candeo said:
I can only imagine.

I never really noticed it before, but the order of events in that song is:

Asking Jesus if he'd like to watch a dance
Dropping to his knees in front of Jesus
Crying "Hallelujah!"
Being unable to speak

Maybe I just have a dirty mind, but maybe that song would be better titled "I can only fantasize".

Kaeetayel said:
I clicked on the page expecting toys like lego or train sets, not sex toys

My corruption is insufficient

...Crap, now I'm thinking what a lego sex toy would look like.

Excluding Unikitty.

Clawdragons said:
I never really noticed it before, but the order of events in that song is:

Asking Jesus if he'd like to watch a dance
Dropping to his knees in front of Jesus
Crying "Hallelujah!"
Being unable to speak

Maybe I just have a dirty mind, but maybe that song would be better titled "I can only fantasize".

Oh my goodness, oh mercy me. I totally get what you are saying.