Description
I told you I'd do it.
The reasoning behind this peculiar headcanon of mine is that Angels are strongly implied to have little to no sexual differences: their children are genderless until adulthood, where they choose a gender presentation, and same-sex couples can have kids together. The logistics are a big author-admitted "idk", which is headcanon talk for "free real estate".
So, are Angels hermaphrodites? Do they work like slugs, where any pairing can have eggs? Well, it'd be the case, if it weren't established that they can only have one kid at a time. (Kieri and Kazai Suizahn being a special case of two kids from one egg.) In hermaphrodite animals, both partners end up laying eggs. So what, is it a penis dart situation? Maybe, but I'm saving that one for Merfolk. Which means Angels need something that'll let them have kids regardless of parents, but only one egg at a time; and that's where my Homestuck heritage comes into play.
That's right, baby: it's bone bulge time!
Well, sort of. But the basic idea is the same: tentacles that lay eggs, simply enough. And then sprinkle on some very restrictive ideas about sexuality and procreation, because we all know Mother Gaia would be the one to impose medieval-ass rules on how people fuck. She definitely watches. The idea here is that Angels have so much potential for fun activities, but they miss out on it because of "how" they're supposed to do things. They don't even know sex is meant to be fun and pleasant, because of Heaven's Shinzo Abe policies. They probably pray while they do it, too.
Anyway, Angel "juices" taste like grenadine syrup. Thicker than water, very sweet and vaguely fruity. Leaves your tongue feeling like you've licked a battery. They don't cum as much as continually produce enough fluid to fill up both ovipositors, and hold it during five minutes or so. If the process is interrupted and the watertight connection ruptured before the egg is fully formed, it might be unrecoverable.
Ovipositors are floppy and squishy and not meant for penetrating. However, since they're stretchy, they can be penetrated with a little effort. The inside is oddly sensitive.
I am putting worldbuilding in my smut because of course I am. Now, back to your irregularly scheduled nicheposting.
Edit for clarification: No, the color isn't tattooed in. It's naturally element-colored; it might be the reason why Angels think cross-element mating is bad. They don't go at their private bits with a tattoo gun, but tbh it wouldn't be surprising if they did.
Goobie II
MemberAdvanced hand holding
SomeInternetGuy
MemberOh, cool! So that’s your head canon!
… So what do you think the other species in the Slightly Damned universe look like down there? The comment about Merfolk made me curious.
When someone makes your joke, but better. XD
ggdk
MemberThen, they discovered calcium and vitamin D supplements and the population took off!
sandentwinks
MemberI know that Demons have shapeshifting genitals that use Chaos magic to adapt to whatever their partner needs.
For Medians, idk. I'll think of something funny. Maybe Jakkai have egg-laying cloacas, and Humans reproduce entirely through non-sexual magic means.
SomeInternetGuy
MemberWhich still somehow includes pregnancy? XD
Unusual Danger
MemberSex²
sandentwinks
MemberMiranda: I'm ready to have a baby.
Cliff: Alright, I'll draw the magic circle.
Same with childbirth. Eases the whole process, and works even for couples that normally wouldn't be able to have kids. Also explains why Humans have the most Mixlings out of any other Median race.
I told you, I'll put headcanon worldbuilding everywhere.
Lightning-studios
Member...I guess that puts the term 'shake hands' in a whole different light...
I gotta give genuine kudos here, this is some of the most creative smutty worldbuilding I think I've ever seen.
sandentwinks
MemberIronically, this is only a problem in Heaven. Angels don't eat, so they can't easily replenish nutrients. In Medius however, they have access to food, so they could very well have all the children they want without breaking their bones.
redwsl1
Memberhandcanon
Login to respond »