Description
A Greater Society - Chapter 38: So Much, So Fast, So Soon Ratte
Story
Daniel and I opened the door, the light beaming through the windows and the color indicative of morning. We traversed the stub of hallway to a certain closed door, opening it to the sight of a still-sleeping Riv. We stepped lightly to his bedside and I gently nudged him awake. After a couple nudges and a big yawn the little boy was one with the waking world.
"Good morning, sleepy," I quietly said, bumping his forehead with my snout. "How are you feeling today?"
Riv slowly sat upright, stretching his skinny arms.
"My stomach don't really hurt anymore," he said, rubbing his small belly with a shy little grin. "Can I eat different food now?"
Daniel and I chuckled as he lifted Riv up and off the bed, pulling him to his feet. We both escorted him to the bathroom to see what his insides had to say on the matter. We stood just outside in the hall as Riv went in and closed the stall door, side to side and our backs against the wall. After how the morning went it was a bit awkward, our standing there in silence. My hands moved from behind my back to hugged across my front the more I realized our positions and our current wardrobes, my nails digging into my sleeves. I tried to just look outward, waiting for the sound of the stall lock disengaging, but from the movement of his shadow I could see the bigger man looking to me.
Without a word I felt a hand on one of mine, the fingers weaseling their way under my own and acting as a barrier between my fingernails and my sleeve. I reflexively looked up to a rather uncharacteristic shy smile on Daniel's part. He took my hand from my sleeve and ran his thumb slowly over the back of my digits like he had this morning.
"You can go get changed if you're uncomfortable in your nightclothes, Reverend," he said. "It'll be a few minutes yet and I'd still like to get his temperature, make sure it's stayed down and all."
I couldn't really find a verbal response, my face slightly tensing as I squeezed around his fingers.
"You have very soft hands, you know?" he observed. "I'd always kinda wanted hands like yours with the soft, short fur all the way down the fingers. Worry a bit people think hands like mine are gross from all the bare skin, so I hope ya don't mind them too much."
"It...never really occurred to me, honestly," I whispered through a slight smile. "I like yours just as they are."
"I'm also glad your clothes fit after all, 'specially since there's two sets."
"I meant to ask about that, actually," I recalled. "Did...you buy me an extra pair? I swear I only gave you enough for one."
"I might've," he coyly shrugged. "Thought it'd be nice to have a spare, is all."
"...Thank you, I appreciate it."
"They look nice on you, too, for what it's worth," he slyly grinned from above.
Something about that hit me with a weird stroke of embarrassment.
"I-I'm sorry?" I stuttered, my voice somehow even higher than usual.
"Not used to compliments about your appearance, I take it?" he chuckled as the lock disengaged and the little boy advanced toward us.
"Um...w-well, I'm...not really the kind of thing people compliment," I said, grabbing and squeezing my arm, my eyes downcast to the bathroom tile. "I'm...small and ugly, and I sound like a woman."
"You're small, but you're not ugly in the slightest," he replied, starting his walk to the open stall. "You're adorable, really, and I love how ya sound-- it's soft and gentle, prob'ly one of the things I like most about you."
My back and tail went stiff as my eyes widened. I was really, really not used to compliments, especially when it came to my voice and knowing what I hid beyond my clothing. The thought of anyone in the world liking anything about me, even if just by formality, was frighteningly strange. Riv looked back up to me with intrigue, likely given my current expression.
Daniel reached the open stall and soon flushed it, walking back out soon after.
"Certainly gettin' better, kid," he said. "Make sure ya wash your hands, now."
The two of them shared the double sink, washing their hands and face before turning back around toward the hall. Riv led the way, seemingly feeling much better than he had been the past several days, which was a huge relief. As they passed Daniel seemed to pick up on my hesitation, wrapping his arm around my back and pressing on. It took me by surprise, eliciting a slight squeak at which he softly laughed.
I couldn't quite help but notice how warm and happy he seemed this morning, at least after the earlier episode. While he was usually pretty jovial and straightforward, something about this felt different and it had since yesterday evening. This wasn't bad or anything, mind, as I liked seeing people happy and he was certainly no exception. Just...something about it.
Shortly after reaching Riv's room again Daniel took his temperature, reading a normal value off the side.
"Well, Riv, I'd say you're more or less over your infection now," he said, petting the boy's head. "Think you're doin' well enough for some real food again. How 'bout you?"
Riv just looked back in sheer excitement. I suppose if I'd been restricted to bland fiber-dense food for five days I'd be happy to get just about anything else, too. His ecstatic grin eased forward a smile of my own as he wrapped his lanky little arms around Daniel's neck. Daniel, of course, was all too willing to return the child's gesture.
"Do let me know if ya start getting cramps again, though, alright?" he requested. "Just wanna make sure everything's workin' as intended."
"Mhm!" Riv squeaked, rubbing his snout on Daniel's cheek before running up to me.
I opened my arm to receive the excited boy, his hugging tight around my small waist. Cleaning off the thermometer the nurse stowed it back in its hard case, then stood up for a stretch.
"Now then, I think it's time for an actual decent breakfast, and one for all of us this time," the large man smiled, taking one of Riv's hands as I took the other.
The three of us walked to the stairs, surely to the chagrin of the staff down the hall given their faces, and descended to the lounge. Daniel and I grabbed a couple pans and set out to make a nice breakfast, this time together, assembling a full platter of eggs, toast, bacon, and small pancakes that Riv happily helped with. Topping the pancakes with some of the maple syrup and the toast with some butter, pouring a glass of milk for each, the breakfast was finished. Riv's eyes were huge and wanting, the child eager to finally cram his cheeks full of flavor after being deprived for so long.
With everything complete and ready, we all took our seats. With Riv appressed to my side and Daniel in front of me I reflected back on what all led to these latest developments. Everything happened so fast I didn't really have time or a good place to think about all of it. I wondered what he thought about it-- I truly did not mean to come across as predatory. He said that my requests and offers haven't been misconstrued but I really wanted this to be something he wanted as well, not just something he agreed to for my sake. It was hard to believe anyone would willingly want to live with me...especially going as far as sharing a bed. I hadn't done such a thing since Hagali, with Esmé.
Despite evidence, Daniel seemed adamant that I was still a man, so...would he really want something like me to be the first thing he sees in the morning?
As I looked aside and spaced I felt a hand touch my idle one, the soft fingertips rubbing my bony knuckles. I looked across the table to Daniel, looking back to me with his head slightly tilted and a small, cautious smile.
"You okay?" he asked, pulling back his hand.
"Y-Yes, sorry," I said, taking another bite. "...Just thinking, is all."
"If you'd like you can tell me about it," he replied, taking a bite of his own. "Won't force ya, but doesn't hurt to let ya know the option's there."
I looked over to Riv who was happily tearing into all what sat in front of him. I don't think he could listen if he tried at the moment, but I would prefer a bit more real privacy for these things.
"...I can tonight if you'd like," I quietly said. "I would rather Riv be in bed first, should that be fine for you."
"That's perfectly fine, I should still be up for a while after then. I'm gonna grab the paperwork while I'm out this afternoon, so might be late a few minutes. Don't miss me too much."
I chuckled to myself as we resumed eating our breakfasts. When we were finished Daniel set forth to wash up the dishes while I retrieved everyone's dirty laundry to soak in the tub. As I scrubbed the clothes Riv helped wring them out in the sink, setting them aside to be taken to the clothesline once I was finished. Before then, however, we retreated to our respective rooms to change out of our nightwear, which I was personally more than happy to do. Dressed in my work clothes and with my hair combed through well enough I left my room, dirty clothes in hand. Riv joined me with his grey tanktop and jeans and soon Daniel did as well, wearing a slate shirt, dark grey jeans, and a black leather vest. He turned to me as he closed the door, his ears tilted with confusion.
"Work clothes?" he asked.
"Eh, well, I don't really have anything else," I awkwardly shrugged. "It's been so long since I've been able to go into town that I haven't...really been able to get any clothes anyway."
"Well, guess I'll need to fix that real soon," he said, taking Riv's little hand. "When's your birthday?"
"...I...don't know, actually."
"What?"
"I don't know when my birthday is," I confessed. "I just...sort of picked a day on the calendar. I only know my age because I overheard it once or twice."
There was a rather odd kind of concern upon his face, though I wasn't sure why.
"...Well, what day did you choose?" he asked as we descended the stairs again.
"Um...it's...really not a big deal, Daniel," I assured. "Please don't worry about it."
"Please, it's important to me," he insisted.
"...It was going to be next weekend," I sighed. "It's just a day, though, so please--"
"I'll keep that in mind," he looked back with a grin.
I gulped.
We finished up the laundry, Daniel helping scrub what was brought down. As Riv and I set out to hang the clothes up to dry Daniel hoisted up the washtub and dumped the spent water down the drain-- something I'd always had some difficulty with given my size.
The remainder of the morning was spent making more weekly schoolwork for Riv while he drew pictures at his table. When I had enough for the week Daniel and I took Riv outside to explore, walking around the untamed lot and running with him through the soft muhly grass.
After lunch the nurse left the house to run some errands as Riv and I washed up the dishes. He was such a good little helper in the kitchen, my bending down to rub the end of my snout atop his head. He'd giggle in response, it warming my heart that he could stand and even long for affection from something like me.
Daniel soon returned with a bag of groceries, two sets of bedsheets, and the paperwork to reopen his current residence. In the grocery bag was one of those seashell pastries, which I quickly handed off to a very happy child.
"Ulimi sends his regards, by the way," Daniel said as he stowed away the groceries. "Misses both'a ya; so far hasn't heard any issues about food contamination or anyone gettin' sick. Said he'd like to come by next Saturday with the usual effects, spend some time here if you're willin'."
"Oh, sure, I haven't seen him in a while," I said. "I'm sure Riv would like to see him, too."
"I guess Tamani went back to Ramios for a spell to help some relatives and prob'ly won't be back for a while, but said he'd get ya both some souvenirs," he laughed, finishing up putting things in the icebox. "I'm real glad that, despite what y'all've been put through here, that ya still have some nice friends. Don't lose sight of that."
I recalled how Daniel had said he never had much opportunity to make any solid friendships given his work, how frequently he was moved from place to place. Maybe I'd come to a point where I took the ramiotrans of this town for granted. They did seem to like him well enough, so maybe with enough time it could all be mutual. I hoped, at least.
Much of the day was spent like any other weekend day, a pleasant reprieve from the past week's stress with Riv's illness. He, too, seemed plenty happy to eat flavorful foods and run about outside again-- the simple things you never thought you'd miss.
Come evening we finally changed his bedsheets to a new set, one smelling of fragrant soap. Riv buried his nose in them, excited to discover the sheets also came with a pillowcase. At nine o' clock it was time for seven-year-olds to go to bed, both Daniel and I putting him down and saying our goodnights before returning to the nearby staff room. As he filled out his paperwork I read from one of his school textbooks, curious about his kind of field.
"Dunno why some are so quick to get rid of those," he said, checking off some boxes. "You pay for them and they'll still be useful, might as well keep them. I do have a handful of those lyin' around at my place, prob'ly the gist of my few possessions. Will that be a problem at all?"
"Of course not," I responded. "I'm not asking you to get rid of anything at all. Please don't feel like you have to."
"Well, at the very least I'll be real glad to get rid of that bed," he chuffed. "Was all I could get on such short notice and no openings for anything bigger."
"Short notice?"
"Mm, well, word about you both traveled a bit and reached the town I was in at the time," he recounted, writing some things in a blank. "Dunno what was about it that caught my interest so fast, but it did. Left the next day."
"...Just for us?"
"Mhm. Wasn't here too long before the posters went up. Here I was hopin' enough to work at the clinic here or whatever, but you offered somethin' a lot better, and finally somethin' where I can just...stay put for a damn minute. I love my career, I really do, but the constant migration from place to place is just tiresome. I get why it happens and all but it doesn't really make it less of a pain."
"Why...does it happen?" I asked.
"Ya got, like, a sorta centralized system for clinics in pockets of the region," he retold, checking another box. "When there's a place needing something you can do, you get stationed there. It's an effort to evenly spread out the professionals so you don't end up with a couple towns with all the doctors and nurses and all the rest with nothing. It's clunky and tedious, but it's there for a reason. Just...eight years of that, though."
"I'm sorry, Daniel."
"Please don't be," he softly chuckled. "I knew it was like that going in and, for a while, it didn't bother me much. Time and stress just add up, so getting an opportunity to stay in one place, maybe get to know some people...really, why wouldn't I jump on that?"
"...Do you really like it here?" I hesitantly asked.
"I mean, Reverend, if I didn't I would just leave," he laughed, signing his form. "If I'm used to movin' around all the time anyway, really, what's one more?"
"...I...suppose so."
He stood up to stow his paperwork in his temporary room to bring with him tomorrow, returning in his sleepwear. Seeing this I decided to do the same, his waiting outside the door until I finished. When I opened it again he stood there, hands behind his back and head low. Something about his demeanor seemed...almost bashful with his ears reclined. I stepped aside to let him in, his slowly walking over to my large bed. Peeling back the comforter he slid in, holding it back in wait for me.
I closed the door and turned back, but couldn't quite get my feet to move.
"Still hung up on somethin'?" he asked from the bed.
"...This is...something you actually want, right?" I returned. "...To...l-live in here, with me? You're not just going along with it...right?"
"Of course I do," he answered. "I'm perfectly capable of declining things if I don't like 'em. I don't feel I'd be jeopardizing my work by doin' so, either, since I recall that's much of your concern. Like I said earlier-- what's another move?"
"I just...don't want to be viewed as predatory for my requests," I admitted. "I've heard similar stories and really...really do not want to be another. Your willingness and desires in this mean a great deal to me and I want that to be known."
"I assure ya that you ain't gotta worry, I feel just fine," he said. "I can tell by your face there's more to this, though, so what's goin' on?"
My face tensed and I felt myself reaching to claw into my arm, putting everything I had into stopping myself. He returned my distant gestures with a look of concern.
"...Is...something like me...something you really want to wake up to in the mornings?" I asked, the apprehension thick in my voice.
Daniel sighed and pat the empty space next to him, inviting me to come lie down. Slowly I made it to the bed, my legs rigid, and gingerly lay upon the open space. He covered me up with the blanket and time crept to an awkward pause. I wasn't sure where this was heading.
"Please look at me," he quietly said.
With reluctance I rolled to my right to face him, my ears flattened and hands folded into feeble fists by my chin. I prepared for the worst. He reached out his arm and I flinched, but was instead greeted by his fingers running through the unkempt fur on my cheek.
"Reverend, I'll be real honest here," he said, taking a deep breath. "You're a tiny thing with big, shiny eyes, long eyelashes, and a high but gentle voice. Your hands and fur are soft and you've a fluffy tail I'd just about die to have. Your face is always just a little nervous, but the times you smile just warm me right up. Like I said this morning: I think you're adorable. I meant that."
Cautiously his big arms reached for me and gently pulled me toward him, holding me close with my head against his sternum. It had been a long time since I last listened to another's heartbeat.
"I know you won't so easily believe me, so I'll remind you of these things as often as I need to," he continued, his deep voice reverberating through his chest as I lay there. "I also know these aren't things you wanna hear from someone like me, which I completely understand, but I hope they matter nonetheless. I like ya just as you are."
"Is it...unsatisfactory to wake up next to me and...not a partner?" I whispered in question from below.
"...A funny thing," he went on to say, "is that you can't really miss what you never had. As weird as it might be, I think I have all I need right here."
"...Me?" I asked. "But I'm...a..."
"I'm not askin' you to change anything...to be my partner, to be a woman, or anything of the sort," he answered. "Just...let me do things like this. Let me help raise Riv. Trust me, talk to me. Be my friend. ...Be you."
It'd been a long time since I last heard words like these.
"...This is all I want, Reverend," he sighed. "I'm sorry it's weird. I'm sorry if it makes you uncomfortable. But...you wanted to know my thoughts, and those are my thoughts. Just say the word and I'll head back to--"
"Please stay."
"Are...Are you sure?" he asked with an unfamiliar wavering. "The last thing I'd want is to make--"
"Please," I said, clinging to his shirt, "...don't leave. Please. I'm...sorry I'm frustrating, I truly do not try to be."
"You know you can talk to me about what ails you," he said, rubbing the end of his snout between my ears. "You can trust me."
"...I will...give it some thought," I murmured. "...Please...give me time."
"Of course. I'll always be here."
His big arms held me close as we slowly drifted off, my falling asleep to the soft rhythm of his heart.
---
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Sparks127
MemberThe precious boy! Love that his eyes see only one thing. :P
Slyze
MemberBlep
Tarov
MemberThis is a really interesting illustration, between the reflection in Riv's eyes and the bubbles in the milk, the detail is very intriguing.
The dynamic between Reverend and Daniel has shifted so much in the last 4-5 chapters. Every day I read, there's so much interesting goings-on!
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