The writing is honestly so bad, that I can't even comment properly on how bad it is.

Cainster said:
The writing is honestly so bad, that I can't even comment properly on how bad it is.

Not anymore.

fox_whisper85 said:
Not anymore.

Sorry, I'm an author for a living and should have given you some criticism instead of making this remark.

Sorry about that.

Let me try it now, even though it's a tad late.

Try using fewer commas. Finish up sentences properly. You don't have to rush the sentences. So take your time and read your sentences over a couple of times.

There were a lot of grammar mistakes and it takes out the sensuality you were going for.

Again, sorry for my crude remark. Hope this helps a little.

fox how come the female pov your making isnt posted yet

RuneGalin said:
fox how come the female pov your making isnt posted yet

I've been busy with the holidays, I have it done, but I will pose it.